Top Reads Of The Week: Please, Stop People-Pleasing

Has anyone ever called you a ‘people-pleaser’ or have heard of that term somewhere before? I’m sure you have, as it is quite a common phrase used in the workplace. Well, what’s wrong with pleasing everyone, am I right? Isn’t it a well-praised characteristic one should possess, helping your teammates and pleasing your co-workers by solving their challenges and all.

It’s when considering everyone else’s wants and needs before your own every single time, that’s where the first signs of trouble begin. It might be a nice gesture at first, fun even, offering to assist those who come to you for help and guidance. You might see it as an additional opportunity to improve relationships, or offering a much needed helping hand when those around you need it most.

But what happens when it becomes overloading, overwhelming, and it’s starting to put unnecessary pressure on yourself. You find yourself accepting and doing a task just because you fear you might be hurting the feelings of others if you reject them. That is where you need to put your right foot forward and say the most difficult thing a leader or working professional could say, “NO”!

So how then do we stop people-pleasing and approach it in a more tactical yet gentle way of rejecting the never-ending request of those around us? Let’s find out more.

The Toxic Habit of People-Pleasing

Being over-apologetic and having the fear of people not liking you can yield tremendous negative impacts on your confidence as a professional. And the sooner you realize it, the better you can apprehend and take action. Prioritizing self-care is key in these situations, and it might sound off as selfish to you at first, but once you see how crucial it is for your physical and mental well-being, you’ll start to realize that being a ‘Yes’-man isn’t a good thing after all.

How To Overcome People-Pleasing: 3 Life-Changing Tips

In this article, find out three phenomenal tips on how you can overcome people-pleasing. I find the “curiosity before commitment” part quite effective for me as it creates a wall of critical questions I should ask myself first before taking on a task. This allows me to think of myself first before embarking on helping others.

Confessions of a People-Pleaser CEO

If you think C-suite executives are spared from this people-pleasing phenomenon, well, you need to give this article a read. An interesting perspective coming from a CEO of a company, realizing he needs to stop being the ‘nice guy’ as it’s doing more harm than good with the relationships he has with clients and staff alike. Have a read and tell me what you think.

Bonus!

Why People-Pleasing Is Hurting You | Salma Hindy | TEDxUofT